36 Things I’ve Learned in 36 Years…  and I’m Not Done Learning.

Becky WilliamsUncategorized

Today’s my birthday, the big 3-6.  I am now closer to 40 than 30, which feels significant somehow (and a little scary!).  I have learned so much and grown so much as a person, especially over the past few years.  In brainstorming ideas for future blogs, I started jotting down a few things I’ve gleaned over the years.  One thing led to another and this oh so fancy list came out.

I have this really bad habit of not giving myself credit for the things I get right or the things that I improve upon.  I tend to brush off the good stuff, because I think I don’t deserve it or it doesn’t feel like a big enough deal in the scheme of things.  And that’s just silly.  😉 

We all have a little wisdom to share, and I dare say we even have an obligation to do so.  I by no means have it all figured out, nor will I ever, but I do believe that some of my personal experiences and take-aways may be of help to someone else.  I know some of these may be “duh” moments for some, but they bear repeating, right?

And here we go….

1.  Changing 1 thing at a time is way more effective than changing a bunch of things.  Focus on just 1 thing and get it down cold.  And then move on to the next.  Baby steps.

2.  Worry doesn’t prevent bad things from happening, it only robs the present of its joy and gratitude.

3.  Everyone is fighting some kind of struggle that you don’t see.  Be kind and compassionate.

4.  You are stronger than you think.

5.  Writing down your goals makes them more tangible and more likely to be accomplished.

6.  Everyone has a story to share.  Don’t be afraid to let it out.

7.  Perfection is overrated and impossible.  Forget trying to be perfect at everything and just be YOU, warts and all.

8.  Everyone could use a coach.  No one knows everything and can do it all on their own.  Having someone who believes in you and pushes you to go beyond your self-imposed limits is priceless.

9.  Don’t feed the trolls and haters.  What they say and do is more a reflection on them than on you.

10.  Don’t take anything personally, good or bad.

11.  Failure is feedback.  It is experience and wisdom rolled up into one.  Learn from mistakes and then move on.

12.  The more you mess up, the closer you get to success.

13.  Gratitude is a powerful and drastically underutilized force.

14.  Happiness is not having everything go right.  It’s enjoying and being grateful for what you have right now.  It’s having a purpose and following your passion.

15.  Staying stuck in the “victim” mentality will ensure that you never get anywhere.  It feels comfortable and safe but leaves you powerless to change your circumstances.

16.  Take radical responsibility for everything in your life.  It’s only then that you are able to move on, make changes, and create the life that you really want.

17.  The little things are what makes life worth living — a stunning sunset, a cat’s rhythmic purr, the warm sunlight on your bare skin on a balmy summer day, a surprise in the mail from a distant friend, the first hot sip of coffee in the morning, the tap-tap-tap of raindrops against the window pane on a lazy Sunday morning, an embrace from a loved one.  Don’t take these for granted.  Savor them.

18.  Coffee, wine, and chocolate are proof that God/the Universe loves us and wants us to be happy.  😉

19.  Never taking a risk is the biggest risk of all. 

20.  Getting onstage in a tiny sparkly bikini is quite possibly one of the most terrifying things you can ever do.

21.  Listening, truly listening, is an underrated skill.  Everyone just wants to be heard and understood.

22.  Patience is a virtue, and one that I really need to work on!  ;-P

23.  Making assumptions almost never ends well.  Give others (and yourself) the benefit of the doubt.  You’ll have less stress that way.

24.  R & R is a must.  Just as muscles need recovery time to grow stronger, so do our mind and spirit.  Even just a few minutes a day can change how you feel, but I encourage you to take as much time as you need to recharge your batteries.

25.  Friends drift apart and that’s okay.  People flow in and out of our lives, and learning to let go with grace and acceptance comes with the territory.

26.  Accepting and loving yourself as is, right this second, is the single most important thing you can do to ensure a happy, healthy life.

27.  To transform your body, you must first work on the mind.  Nothing you do on the outside will last unless you focus on the inside as well.

28.  Take regular breaks from technology and social media.  Unplug from the noise and read a good book instead.

29.  Beating yourself up is counterproductive.  It never creates the outcome that you want and makes you feel worse.

30.  Travel often.  Live somewhere outside of your comfort zone.  You will learn more about yourself than you ever dreamed possible.  You discover just how strong you can be.

31.  Lifting iron is empowering as hell.  It develops strength from the inside out.  And it makes you feel pretty badass.

32.  There is more than enough of everything to go around.  #AbundanceMindset

33.  Kids are like pools and boats.  They’re a lot more fun when they belong to other people.

34.  Making a 5-year plan is dumb.  My life and path has changed so many times and in ways that I couldn’t have ever imagined that it’s pretty useless to try to plan it all out.  I much prefer to go with the flow, enjoy the ride, and see where I end up.

35.  Getting sweaty everyday makes you feel good.  An
d it doesn’t have to be “balls to the wall” to count.  Go for a leisure walk, ride a bike, do yoga, get your kickbox on… just do something that you enjoy.

36.  Own your shit.  Your flaws, your quirks, your strengths, your weaknesses, your thoughts, your beliefs, your body, your mind, your spirit.  It’s what makes you YOU.  There is only one you.  You are a special snowflake.  🙂  Rock your uniqueness with pride.  The world needs it.

There you go, a few of my life lessons learned the hard way.  I can honestly say that I’m still working on all 36 of them.  We are all works in progress, so there’s no shame in that. 

As with anything else, take what resonates with you, and leave the rest.  I encourage you to write up your own list and reflect on what your unique experiences have taught you.  And I’d love if you’d share one or two knowledge bombs with me below.  Learning new things is my jam.  😉